Some of us with Asperger syndrome can successfully maintain relationships and even have children. However, there are challenges such as unfair distribution of responsibilities. A person with Aspergers syndrome may struggle to meet the demands of family life which may put a lot of strain on the other partner. If that partner then expresses frustration, the person with Aspergers syndrome will struggle to recognise this, I personally only recognise anger (or I think I do) and happiness, with little or nothing in between. Tension can then agitate those with Aspergers even further.
Issues for partners of people with Asperger syndrome include:
- Feeling overly responsible for their partner.
- Failure to have their own needs met by the relationship.
- Lack of emotional support from family members and friends who do not fully understand or appreciate the extra strains placed on a relationship by Asperger syndrome.
- A sense of isolation, because the challenges of their relationship are unique and not easily understood by others.
- Frustrations, since problems in the relationship do not seem to improve despite great efforts.
- Doubting the integrity of the relationship, or frequently wondering about whether or not to end the relationship.
- Difficulties in accepting that their partner will not ‘recover’ from Asperger syndrome.
- After accepting that their partner’s Asperger syndrome cannot be ‘cured’, partners can often experience emotions such as guilt, despair and disappointment.